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Secular Philosophic presentation….with refutation by Rev. Bruce for the REAL World

Posted by tawodi on April 9, 2012


Here is a further presentation of a person’s,  “personal Philosophy”  based on modern “assertiveness theory.”

There was more presented than you see here,  but I have taken the liberty of editing it to eliminate those things that took away from his “basic assertions” to show why…In my opinion, as one human to another this can be a pzzz poor way to treat people if you’re not damned careful about it!

HAPPINESS IS GETTING WHAT YOU NEED.

EVERYONE NEEDS: Liberty, peace, health, sex, mind exercise, knowledge,
personal associations, art and creativity, character and a sense of
justice, and to be assertive (to be able to say “no” without feeling
guilty).

NO ONE NEEDS ARBITRARY POWER OVER OTHER PEOPLE – but it is normal to want it.
(I have added here a couple phrases to Mortimer Adler’s definition of happiness).

Also assertive behavior is associated with happiness

The Science of Assertiveness theory — aka folk knowledge (trial and error science)

Assertive (Leadership) behavior of humans: Builds relationships

Will the long-term affects be worse than any short-term discomfort I may feel if I am assertive in the first place?

The word “NO”, may have to be repeated over and over, as in a broken record.

An angry and loud communication can be assertive if one is expressing feelings (Using the word “I”, ( I am really god damn anger at you …)

vs. HOSTILE behavior-destroys a relationship: … You dumb ass, didn’t your mother teach you to report to work on time, etc. etc. Why, didn’t you do such and such….

If someone has a habit of saying, “Why, don’t you do such and such…” we all understand this to mean “I want you” to do such and such. There seems to be some kind of a minor taboo in our culture against people saying straight up, that they want.
On the use of the word YOU:

…the use of the word “you” is assertive when a person is acting in the role of boss, parent, or leader, for example, a law enforcer, a teacher, the chair of a meeting.

“You are expected to” (follow the rules, etc) , then every time the other person comes up with excuses, sob stories, etc, repeating this phase again and again (“You are expected to” (aka using the broken record shows the other person that you are not afraid to stand your ground and they need for them to rethink their poor behavior.

But remember being skeptically silent is assertive. Meaning if I try to get the last word.. will I get punched in the nose or some other bad result.

Speaking up in a group to speak is assertive because one is taking the “psychological space” of the whole group.

Hostile behavior: A person uses sarcasm and intimidation to get what they want. One may get what they want, but destroys the relationship afterwards.
It is easy to give up the benefits of hostile behavior when I value myself enough to avoid getting agitated over minor issues and when I am imperfect and incorrect.

Non-assertive behavior: (shy behavior) doing nothing about unpleasant situations and simply try to ignore ones feelings and desires. While it may prevent conflicts with others, one probably will wind up feeling helpless, exploited, angry, and disappointed with one’s self. Being “too shy” to do something.

For example, “I am sorry to bother you.” This is an example, of how being NICE sucks us into a non-assertive down-hill fall. vs. “I want to talk to you.” “ I need your help or I need or want to talk to you.”

or “It was nice talking to you.” (when it wasn’t and you didn’t enjoy talking to them).

Basic Assertive Rights:

1. The right to act in ways that promote my dignity and self-respect as long as others’ rights are not violated in the process.
2. The right to be treated with respect.
3. The right to say no and not feel guilty.
4. The right to experience and express feelings.
5. The right to take time to slow down and think.
6. The right to change my mind.
7. The right to ask for what I want.
8. The right to do less than I are humanly capable of doing.
9. The right to ask for information.
10. The right to make mistakes.
11. The right to feel good about myself.
Must I always assert my rights?
No, I am always free to choose not to assert myself, assuming that I am also willing to take the responsibility for whatever consequences may then occur.
” I don’t have to be assertive all the time”. Or “I don’t have to be perfect.. I have a right to make mistakes.”

Source: The Assertive Option by Patricia Jakubowski and Arthur J. Lange
and NO TRESPASSING by Barker and Barker.

REBUTTAL BY REVEREND BRUCE.

In the following I included the list of his “basic assertive rights,” again,   for clarity of presentation. If you re-read the upper portion though you will see that the whole premise is shot full of holes from the git go…..At the end of the presentation I explain how and why. ENJOY!….AND AS ALWAYS……..CHOOSE WISELY……………..TAWODI.

Basic Assertive Rights:

1. The right to act in ways that promote my dignity and self-respect as long as others’ rights are not violated in the process.
2. The right to be treated with respect.
3. The right to say no and not feel guilty.
4. The right to experience and express feelings.
5. The right to take time to slow down and think.
6. The right to change my mind.
7. The right to ask for what I want.
8. The right to do less than I are humanly capable of doing.
9. The right to ask for information.
10. The right to make mistakes.
11. The right to feel good about myself.
Must I always assert my rights?
No, I am always free to choose not to assert myself, assuming that I am also willing to take the responsibility for whatever consequences may then occur.
” I don’t have to be assertive all the time”. Or “I don’t have to be perfect.. I have a right to make mistakes.”
Source: The Assertive Option by Patricia Jakubowski and Arthur J. Lange
and NO TRESPASSING by Barker and Barker.

While I find your treatise interesting it kinda falls short in several respects. As latter day Philosophical arguments are wont to do.

I must admit that most of it will stand a simple examination sort of only at the surface of it but I will outline my exceptions and give you the WHY at the end of my post.

Assertiveness training is largely a crock and here’s why.

Basic Assertive Rights:

1. The right to act in ways that promote my dignity and self-respect as long as others’ rights are not violated in the process. [Granted; Not bad on surface examination, but there are corollaries extent, for instance; who decides the “right” of the issue? ]

2. The right to be treated with respect. [ To be treated with respect in almost any surrounding isgranted by earning it Not simply because you demand it. What makes you special?]

3. The right to say no and not feel guilty. [granted; unless it comes from risk assessment to your self…. and not to others!]]

4. The right to experience and express feelings.[Granted; You should be aware though,  your assumption here…. is that anyone CARES how you feel about the issue at hand….. Sorry about that. ]

5. The right to take time to slow down and think.[ Granted;  if time permits…but remember…. it will NOT BE…. if you do not grant that same luxury to others under your charge.]

6. The right to change my mind.[ Granted;  Only someone with an ossified mind would refute this. As long as you are willing to bear the expense, and consequences, of doing so.]

7. The right to ask for what I want. [Granted]….just don’t expect to get it.

8. The right to do less than I are ( sic)…. (am)…. humanly capable of doing. [Granted;  reciprocity being an equal granting of “the right” by you…… When you are the one who is forced to make excuses for poor production performance]

9. The right to ask for information. [Granted;  one cannot proceed very well in any endeavor without accurate information……. Be ready to say you didn’t understand what you were told though.]

10. The right to make mistakes. [Granted;  Every body does…Are you ready to stand and say…. NO EXCUSE SIR!…. If so then…. Carry on!]

11. The right to feel good about myself. [Granted;  IF you deserve to! ]

Must I always assert my rights?

No, I am always free to choose not to assert myself,  assuming that I am also willing to take the responsibility for whatever consequences may then occur. [WHAT responsibility? You didn’t offer any thing to what ever develops, did you?] Ergo: cheap cop out!

” I don’t have to be assertive all the time”. [Granted;  Because that would be a little overbearing wouldn’t it?]

Or “I don’t have to be perfect”….” I have a right to make mistakes.” [Granted;…. Asked and answered.]

Sir; please understand that my issue is not with you, but, when a piece is delivered by some one else… even if attributed to them…. and then claimed as a personal philosophy,…. well then it AIN’T very damned personal then….. IS IT?

It BEGS,  literally BEGS,  to be defeated  seriatum,  ( or, in detail.)

But for modern day philosophy, being what that is….. I would rate it at about fifty per cent….. on the conscience scale.

Be well friends…………….Rev. Bruce……………………………Tawodi

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Information Post. General info.

Posted by tawodi on September 30, 2007


This was a morning post at my Life Religion Family blog on the wordpress platform.

We are beginning to reach out to other organizations as we become better known. The purpose of this is obvious, but the way we will do it is going to be entirely different than that which has gone before. What has to be realized is that many people have put in years or even decades of faithfull service in all kinds of ways to promote peace and have a huge personal stake in what they are doing and just how they do it. It is with this in mind that we are considering a federation kind of organization. What this means is we will communicate and co-ordinate what we do and how we affiliate with them and accomodate their approach,slant and methods, which will leave them as an intact oganization, as well as us being that . The common term would be allies but, it will, and must be, a deeper connection than that.
Alliances usually are temporary things, that work toward short term goals. One thing we are aware of and, you too must become aware of, is that this is no short term goal. I’m 61 someone will have to pick up the torch in the future from me, and others, as time goes by, that is the nature of this. This is bigger than me, you, a small group, large group, even nations.
At least that is the hope. We are relatively small yet, but have talked with people all over the world. They Live in places where the hope of peace is a distant dream and they tell us, that it seems they are never going to see a day where their children can play outside, safely, a sad thought and one that is coming to our country if we don’t get it together, educate ourselves and stop the insanity before it starts ….along with the killing. Don’t say it can’t happen here, neither could sept. eleventh 2001.

I thought that this info. could come here too, as it is pertinent to this site and how we are going to proceed.

Be well, take care…………..Rev. Bruce……………………………………..Tawodi

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SOME POINTS OF CONTENTION IN THE DIFFERENT DENOMINATIONS

Posted by tawodi on July 25, 2007


As I have studied over the years many things have reared their fuzzy little heads as deal breakers,  so to speak,  between the people of different denominations of the Christian faith. There are many bones of contention and I got to thinking that I might as well state my case as to what I believe and what I teach and why I teach it.

Some of these things are pretty big issues …..so here goes. 

What is arguably the biggest is the triune God head which has been taught since the first Nicean conference about 385 A.D. the original argument began before then but it was codified then and forevermore. Since the advent of the protestant movement with the Bible freely studied it is a wonder to me why corrections have not been made.

No where in scripture is there a God in three PERSONS stipulated,  alluded to,  or even suggested. This concept is pagan in origin and wrong. Scripture says there is God the father..none before Him,  none above Him,  none equal to Him,  he does not beget.  He is the alpha and the Omega,  or the beginning and the end,  of all things. Every thing in Heaven and earth belongs to Him,  has it’s existance from him,  and He is the author of all life.

In the beginning was the word and the word became flesh……..Refering of course to Jesus.

Mary was blessed above all women set aside by God to give birth to Jesus as a virgin. This was to set Jesus aside from ALL men forevermore as the Annointed Messiah or the Christ, the son of God. Jesus rules at the right hand of God only that which God gives Him to rule,  on earth and in heaven. Earth was created for him for this purpose. We must NEVER forget that this creation is Christocentric and this has become lost in the mists of time and from mens minds.

After the crucifixion, Jesus promised his disciples He would send a comforter in the form of the Holy spirit.  He stated plainly that it would be given to them from the Father. He did NOT say it would be a separate being that was part of the God head. He said it would descend from the Father,  Meaning of course the Holy spirit of God which binds all livng things together as scripture teaches . Jesus said that they would be given all they needed to know by the spirit and they were, beginning of course at Pentacost, When up to five hundred were touched by the spirit after Peter laid hands on them and baptised them in the spirit.

SOOOOO    we have God the father of all life,  Jesus,  the son of God,  who rules that which God gives Him to rule,  and the Holy spirit from God on high,  that binds us all in the faith and to God and His son Jesus Christ .

The next BIG stumbling block is the rock of the church or the cornerstone. The confusion comes from the punctuation in the Bible of all things. let’s start at the beginning.

Jesus is addressing the apostles at Galilee and asks them “Who do the people say that I am?” The apostles answer “Some say you are Elijah, some say you are John the Baptist, some say you are a great prophet.”  Jesus then asks “Who do YOU say that I am?”  And Simon ever the impetous one blurts out………” You are the Christ,the Son of the Living God!”

And here comes the part in question,  Jesus’  reply…..”Blessed are you, Simon bar Jonah, it is not flesh and blood that has told you this but my Father in Heaven. I shall call you Peter and, Upon this rock I will build my church, and the gates of hell Shall not prevail against it!”

A close exigitical examination of the two words “and”   with the placement of the commas is critical to understanding exactly what was said!!!   Jesus did NOT say He was buliding His church on the rock known as Peter, he at that time was far from being a rock. As a matter of fact would deny Christ three times after Jesus’ illegal trial in the Sanhedrin remember that small fact??  What Jesus actually said was He would build his church on the fact that He WAS THE CHRIST THE ANNOINTED MESSIAH AND THE SON OF THE LIVING GOD!!!

As they used to say in the old country…..oops!  What may be called a slight misunderstanding wouldn’t you agree…..or perhaps you wouldn’t agree………

Jesus did forgive Peter on the beach when he met them there after a nights fruitless fishing and first asked Peter …..”Peter do you love me?” three times in slightly different terms and the third time it is clear that He is forgiving Peter for denying Him on the night of the trial.

The brother of Jesus,  James,  was the head of the Jeruselem Church and Peter was one of the missionaries,  as was Paul.

Did you ever wonder about the status of Paul and why his writings are given so much credence in the company of the other Apostles??

Do you remember the disciple meeting to replace a disciple for the now dead Judas Iscariot?? They elected Mathias didn’t they, that brought the number back to twelve didn’t it??  Who appointed Saul of Tarsus??  Sent Annanias to him,  to teach him and Baptise him,  and through visions instructed him in his mission and ministry? Which has become the arbiter of understanding between Judaism and Christianity,  from time out of mind,  before evil men corrupted the teachings and created neat little things like pogroms and the holocaust with their misplaced hatred of the Jews???

Figure it out yet???   Give up???    JESUS DID!!!!              Remember the Damascus road and what happened to Saul as he went to persecute more followers of Christ??  Jesus stepped in and converted him and gave him the mission that has shaped Christianity more then any one person in history!!

Consider these things when you think about the supposed infalibility of a man who other men appoint the Pope.

Think of these things when you consider many things in the future as we discuss more to come in the weeks ahead and you will learn what it is I believe and more importantly why……because it’s in the scripture that’s why.

Be well all Be safe…………………Rev.    Bruce………………………………………………………..Tawodi

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